A Gap of generations!?

Are we a generation of depressed people ? Were our parents happier than us ? Are we delving too much into this ‘happiness’ thing ?

Not on the verge of sounding too cynical but it seems that people everywhere are trying too hard to be happy.Gone are the days where this was just a mental state and not a choice.Here I am in my late 20s with a stable and satisfactory job and supportive family, sitting on a bean bag and a coffee trying to find ways to be happy.No,I dont want to leave this life and miraculously go on a trip or do something life altering.

I just want to be happy like the way when we were younger.When I didnt have to think about it,I just was.

When I look up to our earlier generations,with no disregard to anyone ,I dont think they paid too much attention to this aspect of their life.They were raised in a different era conditioned to different lifestyle.They were made to study,had job,family,kids,built a home,kids education ,job,their family meanwhile following all the social obligations and commitments and you know what,they did all that happily.They had their fair share of setbacks,ups and down but they never had a problem with that lifestyle.Individually it was never me ,it was always us.They were a unit.They had arguments and fights but they neither wanted to stay in isolation nor wanted to go on trips or outings with friends.They had a sense of responsibility towards their family .

And here all I want is a me time and that too often!

Now its not like we, as a generation,are shunning away our responsibilities.So many people i know are working hard supporting themselves,their families and yet are trying to create a balance between what they ought to do and what they feel will make them happy.We are aware of our duty towards our parents and we do it happily but that is just one aspect.

We want to do more ,something for our ourselves.We dont want to attach our happiness in other person’s achievement.We want something of our own.We want our personal space,personal time,quality time with our friends and not the customary outing with each other’s social circle.

Are we becoming selfish then? As per older generation ,yes we are but if we look at this with our generation’s viewpoints it is perfectly normal. Of course,this is what is generation gap. Yet if we are doing everything correctly,why are we trying so hard to be good at being happy?

Having said that,sometimes I wish our parents generation had this concept of me time too.They were so invested in us that they didnt look beyond it.We were their entire universe and now when most of us have moved out of their homes due to education,job ,marriage or any other reason they suddenly feel alone.It pains most of us because we have seen them devoting all of their youth and energy into us and now we are on the quest of finding our own self.Our grandparents generations mostly lived in joint families so they never faced that problem.

I think it is important to take out time and create an individuality for yourself before comitting to the family life.Just one request to our older generations,please dont judge us for giving ourselves priority.What you guys did was great and cant be compared with but just once allow us to explore our options and if not agreed with our life choices atleast be with us and dont make us feel guilty of following them.We may not be knowing at most of times what the hell we are doing with our lives but trust us because we may not understand a lot of things but one thing we know for sure that we dont want to live a life full of regrets.

PCOD: My journey through it

PCOD: The new lifestyle disease as they call it .Nowadays,one can find tonloads of literature on internet so what new I am going to provide one might ask.Frankly speaking,nothing new or an instant fix.I would just like to share my experience and myself being a doctor all these things are in accordance with the current medical practice.

First things first,one having this entity must understand as i already said this is a lifestyle disease.Solution lies in that.So many people ask, my whole family is following same lifestyle so only why I am getting this.Well everyone’s body responds differently to everything so dont even bother thinking about it.You might just be eating the same thing what your sister or friend is but you are bloating! Its been 12 years since i am struggling with this and believe me when i say i have tried everything well.. almost everything under the sun there is available.To make you really believe,I have even tried homeopathy when I am an allopathic doctor myself!

I would first like to enumerate symptoms wise what havoc it causes on body.Weight gain ,periods imbalance,hirsutisim or excess facial hair,mood changes,skin pigmentation to start with.I came across so many articles telling not to take metformin or hormones as they would only treat symptoms not the root cause.Absolutely true though only the latter part.There are various degrees to which one might suffer from it.First step inevitably is exercise.Start whatever form you like for atleast 45 mins DAILY and you have to incorporate it in your day to day routine.And if you see yourself losing weight then you have to just continue that.Problem solved.

But its not easy as it seems.I will give you my example,as per BMI I was expected to be arond 52 kg and I was 70 kg .I started running for approx 4 kms everyday and 30 mins yoga or aerobics after that and modified my diet too but i could see that i was not losing anyweight. I visited my friend who is an endocrinologist and she told me that as I am having insulin resistance because of increased fat content,my body is unable to digest whatever I am eating causing further fat increase.To aid my weight loss,I should supplement my body with metformin which will help in overcoming insulin resistance.Too much medical talk right!

Basically I want to say that its not always bad to take meds as long as your aim is to treat root cause.So I took it and along with exercise and proper diet and metformin I started losing weight.One thing I would like to emphasize is that My endo strictly told even If you miss meds it is ok but not exercise and proper diet.

Now with the thing which we suffer most is FOOD. I am a big lover of all things fried and spicy and pizza and pasta and its very difficult to leave that all.I dont believe in dieting.Never did it,cant do it.So I started with baby steps.I analysed my whole day of eating.I divided my food into two categories .One which I absolutely can’t do without and one which I can.I am not much of a sweet tooth person so leaving cold coffees,cakes,chocolates,cold drinks,fruit drinks,shakes,yogurt and all was not difficult . I realized that I drink too much cofffee and tea during work which adds excess sugar so I stuck to only one coffee outside in the morning and If at all I feel the need,I prepare sugarless coffee or tea for myself at home.Cornflakes as a breakfast is a big NO! It has a high glycaemic index and therfore bad to lose weight.Prefer muesli or better raw oats unsweetened or unflavoured.I started eating consciously and observing whatever I was putting in my mouth.I almost excluded “processed” sugar from my diet.Then came the difficult part.I decided to exclude all kinds of bread even whole grain from my diet except homemade Indian chapati which is my staple.For some people it is rice.Fortunately I could leave rice and occasionally I used to have brown rice.But however I tried,i always had cravings.I decided I would not abstain because then I would have a withdrawal and then I would binge.So initially I used to treat myself with twice a week cheat meals.Gradually when you see you are exercising so hard and eating so consciously,our mind conditions itself and cravings go down.Try to prepare your own meal .That way you are saving money too and you know what is going in the process of making.Ofcourse,Exercise has to be continued.Very important,Eat three proper meals and snacks in between.Just fruits or salad wont help.

Another thing which helped my body is lukewarm honey water everyday in the morning.Besides aiding in weight loss it also helps in digestion and keeps skin fresh.

Now key here is patience.Because we are not taking any drastic measures here,one must keep in mind that results wont be instantaneous.I see people saying that they have lost 2.5 kgs in a week or so,well good for them.Initially I would just stand on the weighing scale and it wouldnt budge but i just made sure that I have to take one day at a time.Gradually I observed change.I lost 11 kgs but it took me 6 months.I was pretty clear from the starting that this is not going to be a one time thing like in the past i had but I would make small changes that would remain as part of my lifestyle from now on.And I exactly did that.Now running,exercise and proper meals subconscioulsy have become a part of my day to day routine and I feel so good after doing that. I have miles to go and you know I wont sleep even after that ๐Ÿ˜‰

Ofcourse,during this period I had to take hormones to get periods otherwise there is a chance of endometrial cancer,dermatological treatment for facial hair and acne.Gradually as it resumed,metformin dose is reduced and completely stopped along with all allopathic medications. Ofcourse,exercise and diet continued..

One more aspect which every doctor advises is reduce stress.Important as it may sound,this is the most ridiculous advice I personally feel.There is absolutely no way to do it.I think meditation might help though!

As I told earlier,I have been dealing with this issue close to 12 years now,mental and social body shaming unknowingly causes a great deal of trauma to psyche.I recall my first incidence of body shaming when I was just 14 years old and I had gained weight abruptly.I heard two of my relatives speaking in hushed tones that What Have I done to my body and how Ugly I am looking! No need to tell you how vividly I remember that incidence. You know what,As monica rightly said in F.R.I.E.N.D.S ,that little fat girl which everyone made fun of always stays with her and she doesnt let her eat.Its time to make friends with that inner girl and let her eat rightly.Understand that nothing is wrong with you or your body.Its just the way it is.And dont even think of people who only comments on weight. That shows they have nothing better to do than keep a track of your weighing scale.You are Kareena Kapoor to them ๐Ÿ˜‰

Hopefully,I am able to shed some light on the topic and corrected some myths and false prejudices.Do let me know what you think of this or anything you want to ask.

Until then

Love and Hugs

xoxo

Kota factory: A journey

So by now, all must have seen this much talked about web series.

My intention here is not to review what was right,what went wrong,what could have been done.I want to talk about the journey which this show took all of us to.

No..I am not a product of Kota factory but being a doctor I went through the same emotions,same circumstances ,same NEET ๐Ÿ™„. The thing which astonished me most was that we as a struggling student can be a subject and that too an excellent one.

No it’s not a masterpiece.Its not a larger than life story.But it touches your heart strings .It resonates with every student not only who had been a part of it but witnessed it from the close quarters.

Kota factory world also provides a view to the parents,friends, acquaintances of those students and they get to see its not just rosy and comfy once you get them admitted in coaching and hostel of their choice.Series showcased all of this in a funny soft gentle way.It subtly shifts from funny to preachy tones and you won’t realize you have been given some heavy Gyan.You are smiling and laughing at one moment and Suddenly you feel tears well up in your eyes with the nostalgia.

There are moments like mother calling to find out whether you have eaten,Vaibhav leaving for other coaching with all his friends behind,Uday describing parents intention which makes you feel little weak in your heart at times.Like I said simplicity and observance of details is the key here.

Then there are characters which are so relatable.They are like any of us. SOTY2 lovers may disagree with that statement,if there are any! Vaibhav is that wide eyed teenager who convinces with his acting in that make believe world.He perfectly portrays, initially the frustration of not getting through the coaching of his choice and then towards the end as a confident veteran.His cheeky chemistry with vartika takes us back into the time where looking at crush and studying together used to be the dating profile.You smile at the innocence of it all.

Uday reminds us of that one person in every class who has it all ,seems to know it all, careless ,funny , has a girlfriend ( You deserve respect bro!) but is a misfit,whose mind is not into studies but he is cool with it.He is just there to have fun.He understands that parents have certain expectations and it’s not wrong on their part but he also understand his limitations which is a very good lesson given by creators in a sugar-coated way.

Shivangi is that girl who is comfortable,confident and Bindaas.She effortlessly conveys she is not someone to mess with and I loved ahsaasy with her saas to it.Already before this show was a fan of her work.Wish to see more of her in upcoming season.

Vartika is sincere,sweet,cute every boy’s crush .Moments with Vaibhav are a delight to watch.Ofcourse she brings the much needed sweetness in curd.

Then Jeetu bhaiya is there.Everyone knows range as an actor of this iitian and here also he is magnificent as a teacher who is a friend and guide we all desperately needed .The way he conveys life lessons in simple language is what we all wanted when we were young.Waiting for more of him.

And lastly my personal favourite,MEENA!

He is just out of this world.His one liners which not exactly are one ,left me in splits.

“Mitra Uday ji ki hai par Sneh humse rakhti hai”๐Ÿ˜…๐Ÿ˜…๐Ÿ˜….He is that friend who brings a solution to the problem and in return wants a kachori! You know what! you had me at Kachori!! He is a treat to watch.

Ofcourse,due credit must be given to the writers, director and mainly creators of this show who envisioned this series.I really can’t comment on the technicalities but like many people said it didn’t bother me much that series is black and white after five minutes.The kaleidoscope of emotions it brought to me didn’t need any colours.Additionally in my opinion,it conveys that in that age of innocence,we see the world as black and white which correctly justified the usage of it.

Kudos to TVF for bringing such shows and making us happy, genuinely happy !

Hope to see more products from this factory.๐Ÿ˜ƒ

ONE THING.

Hey there

Recently i overheard two teenage girls discussing about how their school life is coming to an end and they are looking forward to their college.They were very excited about whats gonna lay ahead and how they will make use of it and gonna settle after it.Hearing it I smiled not because I am cynical that way but it made me remind about myself.

Some 9 summers ago I was that person.You remember those articles asking about what would you say to your younger self if given a chance.I asked myself that very question.

And i could not think of a thing not because my life is perfect but all those experiences have made me what i am today.

I would not trade those experiences for anything.It taught me to study hard and make way for myself,to fall in love again and again and again and not belittle the power of love.It taught me that its okay to let go of yourself sometimes and drink,dance,sing,be crazily mad and laugh till your stomach hurts with your best friends because those memories are priceless.I smiled because it reminded me of those hostel days when we used to live frugally but we had our friends to celebrate any moment whether its your birthday or just like that. I smiled at the innocence of those serious discussions where we were trying to figure out our lives or love life of a person we barely knew!

You know on our way to adulthood we realize that how when we were younger we were not wrong,we just had a limted exposure to ourself.That doesnt means we took wrong decisions.Its just the way it is.

It was the best time to make long term friendships.How many of us would like to get out of their comfort zone now and would enjoy chat with a stranger. And trust me,even after reading all those cheerful articles about going all out and meet and greet up,we would prefer to have an all nighter with our few old gems.They know us inside out,they had seen all those dreams with us which we are living today,they have seen you evolving,they will remind you at each step of all those things you said you would never do in your life and are doing it now but in a no judgement way.

Remember reading somewhere in an article about the friendships and the impact it has on our lives.Its a no brainer all of us would agree to that.Friends are the family we choose.And sometimes even we wonder ourselves that how did we became friends!There is nothing in common and yet the bond is rock solid.You are a tea totaller,friend loves his booze,you are an outdoorsy person,other loves his book and a couch too much,you loves to dress down ,she loves to dress up,you have a nonstop mouth,other is an avid listener…well this is a win win combination ๐Ÿ˜‰

Point is we just like them.We just pick them randomly one day and decides this is the person i like.Lets do the friendship thing and then we grow together.Every friendship would not stand the test of time but those does,you know are here to stay.And such kind of friendships are formed in the college which those 2 lovely girls were discussing.

So to all the people entering this time of their lives,dont listen to anyone.Go with the flow,make something fruitful out of your lives so that when you look back at this time you have a smile on your face,tears in your eyes and nostalgia in your heart.

Let me know in the comments below what one thing would you like to tell your younger self ?

Love and hugs

xoxo

Just an Average!

Hello there people

We often wonder in our busy lifestyles what if our career is as exciting as it seems in movies or nowadays social media.People are dressing up ,holding coffee,and going to their offices looking like million bucks and HAPPY! And then it dawns on us that we dont have that life and the question “why dont we have that life?” This often makes us think about ourselves that may be we are not that talented or just an average person.My purpose of writing this blog is to cater to an “Average person”.

A person like me

I read somewhere that one should have three jobs or better 3 purposes to keep them occupied.Hold on before making any opinions, let me make this statement more clear.

Thought was, that most of us are stuck with our routine not so exciting jobs with the only intent that we are getting paid .And let me tell you,nothing is wrong or bad in that.Congratulations !You are taking care of yourself or atleast trying to.

Cheers to the JOB that pays..

But you know what,our heart doesnt feel so joyful in doing that daily job though you are satisfied with it..

Some of us want to draw,paint,cook,read,write a book,dance,sing,make a blog,vlog,youtube channel,open a restaurant,start our own boutique,travel, but we are stuck in a rut.Nobody is telling you to just dive in and do the unthinkable.Though kudos to the people who do that! But all of us are not that brave or may be we dont want to monetize everything we do.

Just ย breathe in and start doing what you actually like to do .The thing which makes you feel closer to what you would have been doing if not this job.Start taking out little time and you will realize that it gives you joy.It will make you feel like the lead of your own story

And most importantly,take care of yourself physically,mentally,socially.Take out time from your busy schedule and devote atleast some time to your body.Any form of physical activity you like and you will notice that it brings wonders. Not only it gets you in best shape ,you will feel mentally happy and strong too.

In a nutshell ,one must take care of 3 things in life:

1.Do you have a job that pays?

If you are ok with it,go on girl! How else you will pay for stuff you like.

2.Do you have any hobby or passion which makes you feel happy while you do it?

I am sure there must be something,howsoever trivial it might be. Do it and Do it often.

3.Do you indulge in any physical activity routinely?

5 days in a week counts

If answer is affirmative,you are doing better than most people of your age.

And if not,you know what to change now.

And who knows if you are lucky enough,you will find something worth doing that involves all 3 aspects given above. ย Till then,be an awesomely average person ๐Ÿ˜‰

Love and hugs

xoxo

 

 

No one told you life was gonna be this way!

Well this is the thing about life.It does not come with a manual.No matter how many advices we get from our parents,grandparents,friends,’ wellwishers’ we somehow or atleast most of us fall back ,get up on our own and devise our own strategies to deal with this big bad world which is beautiful too.

I am talking about love which make this world such a beautiful place to live in inspite of all its fallacies.No..I am not a dreamy eyed teenager who is besotted with their partner and thus finds everything fairy although at some point of time we all have experienced or atleast craved for it.I am talking about love that is hard,time consuming,needs effort,selfish and most of all make us wonder is this really love!

We all have in some point of time when we get into relationships think that this is it but when everything new goes past us and we see other people we indulge in a little self thought whether we deserve to be in such a relationship which has nothing new to offer to me. See..I am not passing on a verdict here as to what is right or what is wrong( I am not a relationship expert..I wonder who these people are..Duh!). I am just trying to find out answer to some questions which i have more and more started to believe are not there. Is it the same thing like having different best friends at each stage of your life ?? We all not necessarily share the same equation with our school or college friend with whom once we all used to think of staying together all our lives.We move on and make new friends. Does that mean betrayal?

No. Then why having a different partner in each stage of life is something looked down upon .By this time,all of you must have been convinced about the person i am..Hold on buddies

Or Do you believe you meet someone once in a lifetime who ignites your soul like no other and make you crave about them all day long? Everthing you do together seems like having fun and you cant imagine any other person to be with.

Well..I am neither of the believer of the above two scenarios( as i said earlier,there is nothing right or wrong ,there are multiple possibilities). I believe love is choosing the same person everyday over everything. I find love in sitting and talking and not feeling compelled to please the other person with my thoughts .I find love in working chores together and discuss about all day of work or home. I find love in just sitting idle together and doing our own thing.I find love when other person bares upon all their secrets and trust you that you would take care of it.I find love in sleeping till late on sunday morning and then ordering breakfast because you both are too lazy to move.I find love in all those sleepy afternoons and rainy mornings when you just do nothing together. I find love in making through your all day and then crying in your someone’s arms at night because you feel home and you cant lay bare your soul open in front of strangers. I dont feel love if it makes me all crazy,on my toes and makes everything haywire. I find love when the person brings peace to my life. I dont feel love when i am unable to sleep because of everything goes on in my head.I feel love when i am able to sleep peacefully knowing i dont have to worry about anything not beacuse other person will take care of it but we have each other to face anything come what may!

That is LOVE! (or my verdict of love)

I do wanna know all the alternate notions.So let me know in the comments section below.

Love and hugs.